Sunday, March 13, 2016

From Slacker to Actor

Alright guys, this is kind of lengthy and I kind of blab-on but bare with me, I promise you will want to stick it out until the end. 
Okay! I have been slacking so bad. I started this year planning on doing so many things; Blog, YouTube channel, vlog and losing weight. And as the days went by the months went with them, and I hadn’t done any of it. I actually filmed the introduction to my YouTube channel back in the beginning of January and never edited it or posted it.
                          
Why? Well first of all, I don’t know how to edit videos. I tried a couple times and just got overwhelmed and gave up. Then I decided I would just post it as is but I kept second guessing myself. Eventually, I ended up not even posting it at all. On top of that I was getting married in February and my main focus was on that. 
After I got married I told myself I had to re-shoot the introduction--seeing how things changed since I first filmed it, but I never did. I’m probably losing you, but the point I am trying to make is that I kept making excuses for myself when the truth of the matter was/is I was just slacking. That is just one of the examples of me slacking and that is not even including all the other plans I made for myself for this year. It has been almost a year exactly since I started and posted a blog. That is not okay. I hate that I never follow through with things and that is something that I desperately want to change. In my very first blog I talked about how I want to be an actress but within that year I changed my mind and decided to go for something more “practical”. I thought practicality was the smarter decision seeing how I am a mother and a wife. I felt I would no longer be able to make the sacrifices I needed to make to become an actress. At least that’s what I told myself. But then came the question if you’re not going to be an actress then what are you going to do for the rest of your life? 

From there came a list of jobs, literary agent, editor, interior designer, and other jobs that I can’t remember at the moment. The point is that I kept switching from job to job because no matter what, those jobs didn't satisfy me. Well the reason I wasn’t satisfied was because I wasn’t choosing to do what I really wanted to do in my life. I love acting. Not the being famous part of being an actress-- like most people would think, but the actual process of being an actor. Becoming a character and really putting your heart and soul into it. You aren’t just playing a part you are becoming another person.

 I was sitting down with my family talking about life and stuff and of course, like always, the discussion of what I want to do with my life came up. And every time I make the decision to not be an actress I cry. My mom told me that if I truly did NOT want to act it wouldn’t make me cry when I thought of giving it up. And she is completely right. The idea of not acting made me sad and it felt like I was giving up a part of me. 

The problem is the fear that comes along with choosing to be an actress.  Most of the time it overpowers my need and desire to be an actress. And my mom reminded me of the quote that says, “Sometimes what you’re most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.” And it is the truth, I had/have so many fears and excuses for not doing it, that it pushed me away from the very thing I am called to do.

 It may seem cliché or typical for me want to be actress, but it is my dream and I have finally made the decision to go for it. I am going to work through my fears. One fear at time until I’ve reached my goal and I am able to look back at such tiny fears and just laugh. 

Which leads to the whole purpose of this blog, I am going to go from a scared slacker to a brave actor. And I want you guys to join me on my journey to doing that. One of the excuses that I would say is that I don’t know where to start, well that’s not longer an excuse and my first step is getting into shape. So phase one of this journey is losing thirty pounds, and I need you guys’ help. I am going to be sharing with you my food and workout choices, from the good choices I make to the poor choices I make and I need you guys to help motivate me. If you are also going on a journey to reaching a goal in your life, let's go on this journey together. 

To join me on this journey you can follow along on my Instagram and Snapchat where I will be posting my meals, workouts and just my day to day activities that are steps toward my dream of becoming an actress. The link to Instagram and the name to look for on Snapchat will be posted below. Along with Insta and Snap I will be posting weekly blogs that are going to be “My Week at a Glance” which will be all the obstacles and triumphs I came across in the week. So if you decide to take this journey with me make sure to follow along with me on Insta and Snap because I will be letting you know there when I post a new blog. Until next week guys, stay stress free.

                                        My Instagram!!!